The experience of self doubt is a common private feeling. People tend to keep such feelings to themselves, probably because most people hold a critical perception of it.
We have to constantly remind ourselves that we are not our feelings nor our thoughts, we are what we decide to do about it.
In most cases, the decisions and actions made by us, tells us who we really are.
Coming back to self doubt, this feeling and for that matter all the feelings can be used to gain the skills or perspectives that we require to feel a confident in our abilities and connected to ourselves better.
Patiently and curiously understanding the thoughts accompanying the feeling provides relief and lightness if done correctly. This internal work helps us to gain awareness and insight. It further makes it easier to move towards taking supportive action for ourselves.
For example: If you feel incapable of doing a difficult conversation because you believe you will not be able to speak your mind, the best way to go about it is practice doing it till the time you become comfortable with the words.
What we usually find difficult is, actually practicing our part as we often find ourselves either stuck in the feeling or avoiding the feeling. (Both stuck-ness and avoidance are mental processes which can be grouped under Over-thinking)
Thinking accompanied by Doing- Bridging this gap between thinking about the feeling and doing something about the feeling
Thinking about the feeling has to be followed by a small action to manage or maintain the feeling as needed. Try to compare it with completing protein intake along with muscle training. If your protein is insufficient then your muscles will slowly start weakening over time as its wear and tear is not taken care of. Similarly, Actions- big or small, help in repair of emotional strain that comes with addressing and acknowledging intense feelings. This further strengthens and expands one's emotional capacity which will lead to greater emotional gains.
Hence an action of practice for 10 minutes of what you want to say in the conversation will help you get out of your loop of over-thinking about it.
Thinking paired with Doing, consistently, will lead to more gains!
Let's keep navigating our ways from our minds to our bodies.